Did You Know That I Was A Professional Runner?

Female runner legsOkay so I’ve never ran in the Olympics or anything.  Actually, I’ve never even ran on a track team.  Okay I did attempt the track team once after being told that I was built like a runner but the way my lungs are set up, it didn’t work out.  I became a professional in running away from my problems.

In my 20’s, I always worked multiple jobs and kept a savings account that allowed me to live on my terms.  When I didn’t like a job, I quit.  When I had an issue with a roommate, I decided to live alone.  When I started having problems with my mother, I moved out.  When my relationship was falling apart, I left.  I had put in so much time at one particular company, the manager would allow me to explore other opportunities but always kept an open door for me to return to my position.  The behavior had started when I was a little girl and I don’t think my parents saw it as a problem.  I took piano lessons for a little while.  When I stopped liking piano, I was able to quit.  The same was with tennis, ballet and any other extracurricular activity I showed a short lived interest in.  The problem was that with all the quitting, leaving and running I never learned true discipline, how to speak up for myself or get what I knew I deserved.  I allowed others to dictate how far I could go and where I would go or I just sabotaged it myself.  Well one thing is for certain, you can’t spend your entire life running.

7 years ago, I ended up in Las Vegas because I was running away from a relationship.  It was probably the best run that I ever made but I’m realizing I gave up so much of my power; power and strength that I didn’t know I had.  My situation had drastically changed from when I was in my early 20’s.  I wasn’t surrounded by family or friends and I couldn’t work 2 and 3 jobs so I didn’t have that savings that had provided me a way of escape in the past.  I finally had to face my STUFF.  I had to come to terms with me, what I wanted out of life and stop running from what I didn’t want.  I was attracting everything I didn’t want in life because that’s where my focus was, I honestly didn’t know what I wanted.

It didn’t happen overnight and even these past few months have proven that there is still a little bit of a runner in me but I am learning how to surrender.  I literally had to be left without a penny to my name in order for me to stay put this past month.  But it was the best situation for me in order to stay on the path of living out my purpose.  If I had ran a month ago like I wanted to, I would not have ran into Le’Andria Johnson and discussed The Le’Andria Johnson Collection a couple of weeks ago or had the opportunity to work the red carpet at the Soul Train Awards on Friday (November 7, 2014).  Both of these have been goals of mine, I would have literally been forfeiting my dreams.  I am retiring my running shoes for some stilettos, I think I’ll look better in them walking through these open doors.  I don’t want to be down to my last anymore to recognize all the blessings that are literally chasing me down.  I am ready to receive all that God’s has for me and I am going to continue watering where He has me planted.

I show my scars so that others know they can heal.” Someone needs to see your scars!

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Sunday Mourning


12 comments on “Did You Know That I Was A Professional Runner?

  1. What a great post. Here are some of my thoughts.

    1. If to run is to give up, well, sometime it is good. I always give up until I cannot give up. The reason is that finally I cannot give up in being myself through what i think, feel and do.

    2. Sometime giving up needs more courage than fighting further. I am glad that you learn how to surrender. You could let things happen themselves without your effort. Nature and whatever will take credit to make things happen instead of you. It breaks our ego but giving up is healthy.

    3. Here are some post I recommend.

    Improve the relationship peacefully

    To practice the discipline

    4. Running (physically) is good for your health. 😉

    You learn a lot. That is why you can share us.
    Keep posting

    Jade the Mystic

  2. Yeah, I feel that.

    It’s ironic in my case because my strength is my persistence, but I think I quit too early on my passion once or twice in the past. So now I’m being tested to stick it all the way out, despite the abundance of challenges, with my latest business venture.

    I wrote an article on the blog about how people want to be entrepreneurs, but then asked the question, “Can they stand the pain?” Or in your case, not put their track shoes on.

    Thanks for sharing.

    • I have definitely found my passion. I am just not passionate about where I am. Now I have to get comfortable and stay where I am at and let it all just happen. I have not been a fan of Las Vegas for the 7 years I have been here but I have consistently walked into opportunities.

  3. I loved reading this. I think running in our 20s is definitely different from moving on and seeing why it’s not a good idea to stick around when we are grown. We learn what we will deal with and what we just don’t have time for. Thanks for sharing and allowing us to know you more!

  4. I see myself in you and in this post…

    I wasn’t always a runner, but I was EXCELLENT at turning ANYTHING into an addiction, an avoidance tactic. I, too, know all about coming to terms with and having to face my “stuff”. I say that, A LOT and use that in a lot of my advocacy. THAT is the ONLY way that we truly ever find healing and begin to move forward.

    I’ve also been standing still… somewhat been feeling trapped for a long time. I’ve come to terms with that also, and realized that I am right where I need to be. I am finally living in PEACE, pursuing my purpose fueled by my passion. The rest will come (ie., rebuilding materialistically) all in due time; His time.


  5. Pingback: SoulCycle: SOUL15 at Oprah’s Life You Want Tour Took Me There in 15 Minutes | Rhachelle Nicol'

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