Over the past few weeks, I have been reflecting on the impact of being in an unhealthy and abusive relationship. The relationship affected so many areas of my life, my health, communication and interpersonal skills, challenged my faith in God, made it difficult to maintain employment, etc. It took me awhile to recognize the affects but it has allowed me the opportunity to work on them instead of run away from them. I found my strength when I was able to confront the women I had become and vow to do what was necessary to heal.
7 years ago, I left California in order to start over and rediscover the woman that I had lost; I have definitely found her. Now the thought of returning back home is not as fearful for me as it was years prior. I didn’t think I was strong enough. I thought I would end up back in the relationship I fought to leave. But I’m definitely returning as a new woman, a better woman, a healed woman. I’m ready to live out all my dreams and aspirations unapologetically.
There are so many things that I have learned about myself over the past few years. So many lessons and necessary tools that I will be applying to my life during this leg of my journey.
The power of my “no” I realized that I have a hard time saying no even if I know that it will cause me a great sacrifice by saying yes. I have sacrificed my time and finances because I would not say no. In most situations, I have walked away feeling violated, used and empty. I realized that the times that I knew I should have said no were mere distractions disguised as opportunities. If you’re not careful your intimate and business relationships will re-victimize you.
Setting Boundaries Everyone does not need or deserve full access into your life. Establishing boundaries, communicating those boundaries and then sticking to them is very important. Established boundaries will also make it easier to say no when it’s needed.
I am pursuing the career/business that I want and not the one I need. I am clearer than ever about what I want to do and/or the job that I want to have. I understand my purpose and desire the work that I do to be reflective of it.
I am removing the dimmer from my light in order to shine brighter than ever.
I am finishing everything that I started.
I am living my life on my terms.
I show my scars so that others know they can heal.” Someone needs to see your scars!
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